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18-25 year olds, are most of your friends people you’ve known for a long time, or people you recently met?

Most of my friends I’ve known for at least 4 years, in many cases for longer than 10. I’ve barely made any friends in the past few years considering I’ve been in college – maybe a couple of acquaintances in college, re-kindled a couple of old friendships, but that’s it.

Is this normal or are most people friends with new people a lot of the time? Do you ever meet somebody and then they can have the same position of importance as an older friend, or is it always different? How long does it take to get close to somebody?

I’d like to make new friends but I’m worried it’s such a slow process it’s too hard and they will already have old friends too and not be interested in somebody new.

I guess it all depends on the type of person you are aswell. I moved half way round the world from Scotland to Sydney, Australia when I graduated high school and it’s then you know who your true friends are. I still keep in contact with a few close friends but life moves on and ultimately it’s up to you if you find other close friends in your area.

I think what happens with high school is you are molded into one group or another and when you graduate you step back and have to assess whether you were good friends because you had a lot in common or because you spent hours and hours at school and studying together.

University/College is probably the easiest way to make new friends however you are right it shouldn’t be hard. Normally you will click with people straight away however sometimes you need to go out for a drink with someone you are not sure about to be introduced to their friend who you click with. Don’t limit yourself because you think you are being unfaithful to old friends or because you think its too hard to make new ones, so what if they have old friends too – you will just expand your friends base. It is certainly lonely when you sit on your own because you don’t want to try.

In short, never stop trying to make new friends, it can take time but all it needs is one good night out and the promise to catch up for coffee to continue an interesting conversation. Don’t say no to going out with people you don’t know all that well, even if you don’t get on with them all that well, you might like other friends they bring along.

Goodluck!

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